This IS What you Get

So lately my mind has been in like a million places. I have been up and down trying to figure a lot out. You see I am in my senior year in high school. I'm going to done in 30 days. And that is one of the biggest, craziest thing. I thought that I was going to know exactly what I want to do with my life. But turn out I’m wrong.

I know what I want to do. Don’t get me wrong. I just didn’t do well planning for it. I know that I want to be a professional Christian singer. I want to glorify god in all that I do. I don’t just want to do it for me. But, How am I even going to get there. I know it will take a lot of work. And I am ready for that. I’m ready to work hard for it. However I could have applied for college classes at a few collages to Study Christian Contempary Music as a major. I should have went and applied for the school. For that major and I am kind of regretting not doing it. But I guess I will have to work ten times harder now.

Another thing I really should have got a job. I am applying now and I know it will be hard to get one but I am trying. I’m going to need money to get my license a car pay for insurance. To get my own place eventually. And it will take forever I know. But I have to start somewhere.

So the whole point of this is to tell you don’t wait to start your life. Its something I’m not so happy about because now I am not ready for life after High School.

I mean Heck Yea I loved the things I did in High School. I loved all the choir activities I did. All the time spent in class working hard on music and then performing it with in the four years I have been there. Also working on tech and acting on stage. It was the best thing ever. I made many great friends. While having a ton of fun. If would of had a job maybe I wouldn’t have been able to do all of that. And I don’t regret it. I just wish I was more prepared.

So do what you can to be ready but don’t regret what you have done.

Drifting away-Poetry

 

No one cares about the broken hearted
The silent screams that come from inside
The tears cried at night in the pitch black room
She’s never felt so broken down
Never thought that a hand could so much harm

She tries to sugar coat it
Saying its all okay now it’s going to stay this way
Forever, never to change no more
When its all a lie
And no one bothers to pry the doors open

Inside she is slowly dieing
Losing everything she is
Pushing her friends away
Hiding the secret of death that hides around the corner
Not bothering to stop the dripping ruby red blood

It runs like a constant river
Like her tears that flow and flow
They can never stop
For everyday she hides how she feels
Trying to keep the attention away
To keep people from noticing she is broken

She is dying and no one is stopping her
They are all standing by
Watching her slip away
Farther and farther
Until she is no more

 

All Content © Kacie Lampman 2009 - Please do not steal from this blog.

I LOVE YOU-Poetry

They say love never fails
That when someone say I LOVE YOU they mean it
But it does fails and those word are meaningless
Then your left broken shedding awful tears
Then they will tell you the broken heart heals
But I am the living proof that it doesn’t
Not with out a lot of work
Sometimes that work pays off
And Sometimes it doesn’t
I cant say I am over you
For I am not
I do miss your tender kiss
Of your soft pink lips on mine
And the way my skin tingled when you touched me
Your hands holding mine
Your arms wrapped around me
Holding me as I cry into your shoulder
I still love you more then the world
Maybe I’m wrong for feeling this way
But the truth is i still and will always love you
When I say those word I mean it
Its not a lie
It the truth
The truth that cuts trough the air

Sudden Changes

Its totally one thing I really do not like at all. I live at home with my sister dad and mom and now my brother…

I love my brother he is cool and all. And maybe the fact that he just got here. And I like my free space and our house is much more crowed now.

Is it wrong that I get annoyed so easily? Because I love my family and I missed my brother when he was gone. But Its weird and I don’t want to be the bratty 18 year old sister telling her 23 year old brother to give me my space.

Its gonna be hard because I am just now in this place in my life that I’m not sure where I am going. And what I am doing. I look at my older sister and she has her kids and a hubby who loves her. Then my brother who is struggling to go on but is a really cool and strong person.

I guess I’m just going to get used to this. I’m losing my space and will have to be nice and careful. Oh my what a crazy thing this will be.

SPRING BREAK 2010

Many people spend their spring break outta the city or outta the state. While others just do what ever. For me I went outta town but not onvacation. To what I call my second home. That would be my older Sisters Tracys house. I love my sister and her family. Her kids are fun and crazy. Sure sometimes they make me mad. And I have to punsih them when they are not lisening. But I do love them. I have had to deal with them say ing I hate you and no I don't have to listen to you. Your not my boss. Though at time I am.

We had fun going to my nephew baseball practice. Its his second year playing and he has a new team. But he liked it. He tells you that he doesn't want to play that he's being forced to but he really loves it. He loves it a ton.



And then theres my niece who reallt hasnt done much. She loves messing around with me when I got my camera. I was testing out some stuff with it and having some fun. She loves to pose infront of the camera. It kind of funny. But she's so cute haha.



But even though there were times when I got mad at the cute kids and argued with them I love them and had alot of fun at my sisters we are very...Strang hahaha. WIsh I had a pic of all three of us to share but I have different ones

Well thats all for now but its a grand break. I love my sister her hubby and kids...two days left till back to senior yeat :)